Jorge Gets his Shit Together

An Email from Greg to Mark


Oi! Physically, I've been a lazy piece of shit, and now I'm not even a vegetarian. I just got back from Harbin and noticed how much my little tummy has grown. I pretty much lived on deer sausages and beer while I was there. The city is amazing! It's Russia with Chinese people instead of Russians. I went there with a 60-year-old Scottish woman, which wasn't as fun as I thought it would be. Why aren't you here? Anyway, I'm back in Shaoxing for two days before the second part of my vacation. This place is a ghost town. Creepy. I could run around the campus naked and no one would know. 

This is my first day of recovery, so I decided to eat only vegetarian today and do a jump-start workout. I worked every muscle group a little bit just to see what needs the most work. I certainly need to destroy my gut. Tomorrow I'm going to go running. Gunna run the track, gunna do intervals. Running up the back steps. Running down the front step. Got to make my mind up. Which steps should I take?

Anyway, I kept telling myself, "Iron mind iron body" because you used to say that all the time, so I googled the phrase to see where it came from, and the only thing that matched was your blog, which I completely forgot about. Then, after I opened it, I see that you started writing in it again for the first time since 2009. I had to check the dates a second time. Isn't that crazy? A few days after you started the blog again, I accidentally found it on the Internet, the first thing I found after not having the Internet since the 16th, which is also when you posted. It's like we are connected on a quantum level, like two biceps on the same body, possibly Deepak Chopra's body. Hot stuff, coming through.

I just thought I'd let you know that your iron mindwaves reached me all the way in China, clearly proving that there is no such thing as distance at the quantum level, and by quantum, I mean something that has to do with psychology but it's too complicated so I use a scientific term from physics to trick people into thinking I'm smarter than I am by describing what I see, but not really knowing why those observations occur, hence the contrived quantum bullshit explanation.

I'm going to get back to exercising, even though I can't eat those fancy foods that you listed on your blog because I'm not a privileged Westerner. Looks like rice and cabbage again...